Monthly Archives: October 2022

The Mental Health Blog #3: Fear & Anxiety

Here is the third blog on my mental health, where I shall update you on how I have been feeling emotionally and mentally. This is a fairly short article, but today I want to talk about fear-driven anxiety. Anxiety really spurs from the fear of something, for example potentially a large social gathering, because one may develop Social Anxiety. That’s what happens to me. Fear and Anxiety almost rule my life despite how hard I am fighting. Sometimes I am too anxious to get out of bed because I’m fearful of what the day may hold or bring, or I am fearful of waking up feeling the same way everyday; depressed. I am sometimes just too anxious to function. But I have to realize that it is really simply fear, and the only way to conquer that fear is to fight it. If you do not battle your demons, you will not win. The battle may be slow. Mine has been and still is. But there is light at the end of the tunnel and I believe that one day the anxiety will fade.

The Mental Health Blog #2: Losing Someone You Love & Grief

Here we go, the second blog. So, lately I have been struggling with loneliness and have been missing my deceased loved ones a lot. I have dealt with many losses in my life. I grew up without a Grandfather, only Grandmother’s. However, sadly, both my Grandmother’s passed away, as did my Uncle Gary. I lost a friend due to a chronic health condition, as well as two other friends; I am going to disclose how they passed for their family and for privacy purchases. My puppy was stolen back in Tampa, and recently, my two cats passed away. I had those cats for about 18 years. I got them when I was 7. They were my best friends and truly were emotional support animals for me when I look back at it. They weren’t stereotypical cats; they played fetch and went outside. It broke my heart so badly when they passed away. Unfortunately, I had dealt with grief and loss before. First comes the incredible depth of sadness and the waves of tears. Then comes the anger where you are just furious at the world for taking away someone or something that you love. Then comes grief and the mourning process, where we, or I at least, am constantly yet sadly reflecting on all the happy memories with my all loved ones, and how proud of me they might be of me, hoping that they are. I pray for them and pray to them asking for strength and I focus on all the good times I’d had with them. Now for me, that’s how loss works. But we must focus on the fact that they may be lost but are not gone, because they will always be with us. We must think of the good times and smile, because it’s what they would want. They would wish that we would have a good life and a happy one. So in my opinion, we must live our lives how they are; as we must not dwell in sorrow or in the past. We need to focus on the future and always keep our loved ones in the back of our heads and as long as you do that; you will never forget them. Our loved ones will give us the strength to keep moving forward and to keep bettering ourselves, and it is also up to us to make them proud. To all my lost loved ones, I love and miss you, and will see you again soon.

The Mental Health Blog #1: Self-Consciousness and Comparison’s

First and foremost let me explain what these blogs will consist of; although it is pretty obvious due to the title. I will be creating weekly to monthly blogs updating readers on my mental health and how it has been affecting me lately, as well as advice to others. Today’s first one is about Comparison; being too self-conscious and comparing yourself to others. Being self-conscious is very. hard in itself. I constantly compare myself to others lives, often to people who graduated college and have kids or are married/engaged and have all these business type jobs. I get down on myself because I think, “Why can’t I be like that?.” But at the end of the day when I analyze myself, although I’m different I realize now it’s good to be different, because being different can make us special. We are different, not less, and sometimes different begins to intrigue or almost intimidate people. Being different is special because we (people with mental illness) have different mindsets; and we can help recognize problems within others whom may seem “normal,” so that we can help them. Never compare yourself to anyone else, because we are all on our own paths and journey’s in life. Plus if you’re judgmental of others, you’re just an asshole. We are all perfect as ourselves and all are beautiful inside and out as God mad us because we are all human. So different or not, we are not less. In a certain sense, we are MORE.

National Mental Health Day

October 10th, is National Mental Health Day. Here is a piece of advice coming from someone who struggles with mental illness and struggled with addiction. To all of those whom may be suffering, just know that you are not alone, and that its okay to not be okay. It’s okay to cry, because we are all human, but you need to let emotions out. Compartmentalizing mental health or trauma only makes it tougher, so getting emotions out is key because it can take things off your chest and lessen the intrinsic pain. In a sense, talking about issues to friends, or professionals, can really help and is a relief because some Doctors can relate and know how to help. To anyone reading this or seeing this; Know that things do get better, you just gotta keep keeping on. Lastly, don’t get down about yourself because you’re a human being and that in itself makes you beautiful.

If you need help, I suggest you speak with a clinician, therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist. I also suggest a blood test to determine mental health conditions so you know which medicine to take. If things are really bad; you can call the Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. OR you can talk to me, I’m here for everyone within the mental health world.

God Bless

– Tommy Roel